


Abandoned Love

by KAddict



Category: VIXX
Genre: Abuse, Angst, M/M, Mental Health Issues, Rough Sex, Smut, part 1 of 2
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-28
Updated: 2016-06-05
Packaged: 2018-07-10 16:53:55
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 2
Words: 10,532
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6996622
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KAddict/pseuds/KAddict
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There is only so long that one can continue to be surprised by another's actions, and Hongbin has long past that point. The image of what Taekwoon's love used to be has been forgetten, replaced with violent encounters and drunken whims. Hongbin is used to it and he wouldn't desire for anything other than Taekwoon to continue being by his side. Hongbin doesn't care anymore if Taekwoon hurts him, however how long will Taekwoon be able to continue this before something goes terribly wrong?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Part 1

Can one imagine such wonders as reveling within tepid, peaceful showers with the one you love? Feeling the warm water pelt against your back, as your lover wraps his arms around your shoulders. Nothing could go wrong in that moment, and you trust he would never take advantage of you in that environment. You’re both able to simply enjoy the feeling the wet substance fills you with, as you both express your love in a healthy way. With light kisses as he rubs soap onto your back, slightly fondling your body as he goes along. Sexual desire is surely present, however it’s not necessary. In that moment, you know he loves you and there’s no need for anything more.

Hongbin can not only imagine it, however has fantasized and day dreamed about such a moment for as long as he can remember. Since long before he met Taekwoon, however the fantasies have only grown larger since he has. They have stretched far beyond what they used to be and they hold so many sweet concepts, however he has realized something he didn’t know before Taekwoon came to be. That fantasy he has imagined in his head for so long, it’s not realistic in the slightest.

Taekwoon is and always will be his only lover, however Hongbin will never see this dream realized with him. Showers with Taekwoon are steamy, passionate sessions between the both of them. Scolding drops fall harshly onto Hongbin’s skin, as Taekwoon explores his way around his thighs. He feels every inch of Hongbin’s skin, dragging his nails across the younger’s scars as his hands move upwards. Hongbin would never admit it, however the touch makes him uncomfortable. Taekwoon did deliver those marks into his flesh, so he supposes he deserves to feel them all he likes, however being the receiver Hongbin wishes he didn’t need too. Never the less, he doesn’t protest. He allows Taekwoon to do whatever he likes. Finding odd pleasure within the feeling of Taekwoon’s tongue licking the now cooled water from his stomach. That pleasure continues and soon Hongbin forgets about his discomfort, as Taekwoon flips him towards the opposing wall. The steaming liquid continues, as Taekwoon thrusts himself into Hongbin’s fragile figure.

He can’t deny how those sessions feel. Hongbin is far past used to Taekwoon’s behavior and is willing to except how he is, and he can’t claim that Taekwoon is the only one that finds joy from screwing Hongbin like that. It’s painful and Taekwoon almost never prepares him properly. He gets so intensely aroused that he just forces it in, however the shower is easier. Hongbin can still enjoy the act just the same, and there is no mess for him to tend to afterwords. Occasionally Taekwoon may take it too far, however he doesn’t need to worry about the blood while they are in that place. It’s not the caring and wonderful thing Hongbin dreams about, but he supposes it’s as close as this earth is willing to get.

That same phrase is what Hongbin thinks about most of his life. This life is not a giving one and the world is supposed to suck, however Taekwoon is as close as it’s willing to give to an angel. Others may call him a bastard, drunk, offender, however to Hongbin he is nothing less than perfect. His faults are what make him so precious. Hongbin needs Taekwoon, he’s not complete without him.

Isn’t that what love is? Finding someone to make you whole within each other? Hongbin believes Taekwoon could survive without him, however Hongbin can’t. The words Hongbin would call himself, useless, cowardly, burdensome. He’s all those things and more however, Taekwoon gives him a purpose. He gives him worth and Hongbin would be nothing without that.

He remembers those thoughts every waking second of his life. He clings to those thoughts, never allowing himself the opportunity to forget. No matter how difficult Taekwoon may be, Hongbin needs him. He needs him more than he needs the needs the air he breathes; hell Taekwoon is the air.  
~~~~~~~~~~  
“Hongbin, are you even listening to me? Hello? Hongbin!” Taekwoon’s outburst snaps Hongbin from his daydream, his lungs abruptly in taking air as he attempts to recall what he had been doing. He’s at the dining table, a small plate of food in front of him as Taekwoon feasts on his own beside him. 

“Were you listening to a word I’ve said?” Taekwoon’s voice sounded soft and delicate as usual, however there was something off about his tone. As if Hongbin had irritated him, giving him warning that he needed to speak lightly.

“I’m so sorry. I got distracted for a moment, what were you saying?”

“Aish, where do you go when you do that? I was telling you that I’ll have a few more obligations for a while. I’ll be home later than usual.”

“Oh, okay. You’re getting busy at work. I’ll try to work on my cooking and I’ll make you some delicious food to keep your energy up.”

“That’s what I like to hear. You always say the right thing…..It’s so goddamn sexy.” Taekwoon leaned closer to Hongbin, as his breath grazed across Hongbin’s ear. He felt Taekwoon’s teeth nibble at his skin, as his hand began to work its way underneath the loose boxers he wore. The move was sudden, however not unusual and Hongbin rapidly adjusted.

“I….I suppose so.” Hongbin struggled to find the right words to say, as Taekwoon shifted his position. He faced the younger directly towards him, their faces millimeters apart.  
“You’re so freakin hot. Fuck it. Let’s have a little fun before I leave.” Hongbin could not deny the other, as Taekwoon’s tongue crashed into his mouth. Hongbin did nothing as Taekwoon pushed him to the floor, his hands ripping Hongbin’s boxers from his skin.

The two exchanged heated breaths, as Hongbin wrapped his fingers around Taekwoon’s back. He gripped onto his skin, allowing Taekwoon to do as he pleased and loving every second of it.

“Mmm…you smell good Hongbin. Delicious.” Taekwoon’s tongue slid down Hongbin’s stomach, curving till it reached his thighs. Hongbin bit his lip, attempting to suppress the growing tension as he grew hard. Watching Taekwoon drop his own trousers, feeling his mouth against his skin, it was too much to resist.

“Please Taekwoon, will you stop teasing me.” Taekwoon giggled, enjoying the elated feeling he got from this. He liked listening to Hongbin beg.

“But why? Your voice is so melodic…say more.” Hongbin would have liked to obey Taekwoon’s request, however his body had other plans. Taekwoon’s tongue finally moved to new locations, placing rough love bites along the way as moved towards Hongbin’s most sensitive areas. Taekwoon’s hands played with Hongbin’s increasingly hard package, his fingers stroking his length just barely enough to get Hongbin excited.

“Taekwoon, please. Stop teasing.” Hongbin could barely make the words out as his breath struggled to steady. Taekwoon didn’t ignore his plee, only flipping the man to his stomach. He shoved Hongbin foreword, forcing him to grip the legs of the dining chairs for support.

From there he spread Hongbin’s legs, clearly displaying everything he desired to see. Hongbin gripped tightly to the wooden legs, his breath sharply in taking as he felt wet fingers force their way into his ass.

Hongbin began to feel blood seep down his lips, his teeth sinking deeply into the pink flesh. He held his breath as Taekwoon moved his fingers in and out, moving faster and faster each time. He continued until Hongbin had begun to feel close to elated from the sensation, and then he gradually removed the fingers.

It took much too long for Taekwoon to fuck him. He allowed Hongbin to lie there, smiling as Hongbin pleaded from the loss, asking Taekwoon to continue. He didn’t listen, only doing so after Hongbin had stopped. Once he had, he didn’t hesitate to shove his cock between Hongbin’s ass cheeks.

Taekwoon fucks into him, Hongbin wanting so badly to scream but trying his hardest not too. He grips the wooden support so tightly he feels it may splinter, as Taekwoon loudly moans. The movement gets faster and faster, more and more raw till Hongbin can’t take it anymore.

Hongbin screams, his eyes filling with black stars. He can tell that some sort of liquid is dripping from his ass, however he can’t tell if it’s Taekwoon’s release, blood, or possibly both. Moments later, Taekwoon pulls out. Hongbin feels exhausted, weak. His vision is blurry as he lies there, attempting to recover from the intense sensations Taekwoon had put him through.

Taekwoon takes a few minutes to catch his breath, collecting himself and redressing before he stands and walks towards the door. It’s not even close to enough time for Hongbin, as he has still barely been able breathe the shaky breathes he has. Hongbin feels as if he can’t move as of yet and he doesn’t try.

“Ahh, good boy Hongbin. You’ve been so obedient lately, it just makes me love you more. I have to go. Clean up this mess and once you’re done, you can speak with Wonshik if you like.” Hongbin’s mind was stuffy and his thoughts all mushed together however when he focused intently enough he could clearly hear the sound of Taekwoon’s footsteps, as well as the light slam of the door as he walked away.

A decent thirty minutes must have passed before Hongbin regained his sanity to a good enough degree. With Taekwoon out of the house, he felt a little lost and simply lying on the floorboards suddenly seemed like a good time. He lied there and thought as his breathing evened out, his muscles ever so gradually becoming looser.

Once that time had passed, Hongbin felt as if he may be well enough to stand at this point. Once again pushing his weight against their dining furniture, Hongbin used it to steady himself. His legs were tired and the slight movement sent searing pain through his lower half. Hongbin ignored this, continuing the process until he could stand in front of the scene and see all of what had been soiled.

Doing it on the dining room floor may not have been the best idea, as their house wasn’t exactly the most pristine to begin with. The flooring was dingy and rotting to start, but now that had only increased by around twenty times.

With his mind slightly clearer, Hongbin could begin to make sense of everything that had happened whilst, and after Taekwoon was fucking him. He had been too occupied to do it previously. It looks like there was a little blood, however not much. It was just trickles and drops and the large majority of that came from the love bites. The only thing seeping from his ass appeared to be Taekwoon’s cum, which Hongbin didn’t mind even a little bit.

That and his fingernails. When looking at the furniture, Hongbin could see Taekwoon wasn’t going to be impressed. He had left fingernail marks in the chair, scrapping along the sides in a clear hand shaped pattern. There were still bits and pieces of his skin embedded into the shredding’s.

Overall, this wasn’t going to be difficult. Hongbin was sure he would have trouble walking for a little while and his nails would take ages to grow back, but other than that this was no big deal. The love bites and everything else barely registered in his mind.

Taking a deep breath, Hongbin moved to clean the mess. Starting with the one on the floor. Before he began Hongbin slowly and carefully put his boxers back on, ensuring they were tight and fitting this time. He didn’t know if all of Taekwoon’s seed had found its way out yet, and he wouldn’t want it making a bigger mess before he was done cleaning the first.

Hongbin rearranged furniture and scrubbed at the flooring till not a speck of the act remained. He also sprayed some sweet smelling scents around the house to rid the place of its awful sex stench. He cleaned his skin from the chair legs and did his best to make it look as normal as possible.

On the table lie the remains of breakfast. Hongbin smiled as he moved to pick up Taekwoon’s plate, empty and clean as usual. His own he had barely touched, however that wasn’t important. He wouldn’t dare to eat it now anyway. Hongbin threw the leftovers to the garbage and washed the dishes, checking everything thrice to ensure he hadn’t forgotten.  
Once cleaning was done, Hongbin didn’t know what he was supposed to do. He was drained of all energy however tired wasn’t the word for it. He couldn’t bring himself to eat while Taekwoon wasn’t there. He could get dressed but his muscles hurt too badly, and there was a part of his brain that told him he may fall. Hongbin couldn’t see the point anyway. He wouldn’t go anywhere without Taekwoon by his side.

It had only been a couple hours since the two’s departure, meaning Hongbin still had ages of time to kill. Hongbin thought deeply, only vaguely remembering Taekwoon’s words.  
“-once you’re done, speak with Wonshik---you--like.” Wonshik? Taekwoon must have really enjoyed himself that morning.

Hongbin knew this because Taekwoon hated Wonshik, just as much as Wonshik hated him. Wonshik couldn’t understand their relationship. He couldn’t understand the love Taekwoon and Hongbin held for each other and it was his life’s mission to break them apart.

Knowing this however, Wonshik was Hongbin’s only friend. He had many others before Taekwoon, but Taekwoon isn’t fond of company. He didn’t like them so Hongbin cut them out. Wonshik was just like a leach that refused to remove itself.

Despite this, he was a good friend. At times he was fun to speak too, but mainly he helped pass the time until Taekwoon returned home. Hongbin moved himself to the couch, his body and voice sighing with relief as he lay stomach first onto the cushion. It relieved pressure.

Hongbin grabbed their home phone (as he no longer had a cell phone) and dialed Wonshik’s number. He wasn’t surprised when it took no time for the other to pick up.  
“Hello.” Wonshik answered in a calm, slightly disturbed voice. It sounded as if he had been screaming at someone before he picked up.

“It’s Hongbin.”

“Hongbin! It’s been weeks, where the hell have you been? Are you doing okay?” Wonshik’s question struck an odd chord in Hongbin. The majority of his brain didn’t care and found Wonshik’s question repetitive, however a distant portion felt somewhat bad for making the other worry.

“I’m fine.”

“Are you sure you’re not in pain?” Hongbin’s hands trembled. He hated that question. Wonshik always took it in the wrong way, the worst way Hongbin could possibly imagine someone taking the news.

“Wouldn’t I tell you?” Hongbin did his best to sound angry. Wonshik felt giving somedays and would allow Hongbin to continue on with his state of mind, however it seemed today wasn’t one of those days. Hongbin’s tone didn’t stop him. 

“No. You would do what you’re doing right now. What did he do? Hit you, or was it just fucking this time around?”

“Shut your mouth.”

“Thank you Hongbin. My concern feels really appreciated. Just one last question. Did the ass-hat leave afterwords?” Hongbin sighed, his head drooping. Wonshik must be having a bad morning. He knew where this was leading, as they had gone here many times before. It never ended well.

“Wonshik, don’t call him things like that.”

“That’s what he is! I’m not going to sugar coat it for him.”

“Don’t do it for him, do it for me. Don’t say things like that, because I love him. I don’t like it.” Hongbin could hear Wonshik groaning through the line, he could practically see his eyes rolling. Hongbin didn’t understand why that was such a hard concept for Wonshik. He’s told him time and time again, yet every conversation he needs to be told another time.

“Hongbin…you’re seriously screwed in the head. How many times do I need to tell you? Stop wasting your time on that bastard. He’s abusing you and using you for the sex.”

“He’s not abusing me. Taekwoon loves me back.”

“Really? How many times did you guys screw since yesterday morning?” To most it was surely a bad sign when Hongbin had to actually think quite deeply about his reply. Even more so when it took nearly all his fingers and toes for Hongbin to calculate the number.

“Maybe, 5 or 6.”

“Holy hell Hongbin!! THAT’S NOT NORMAL!!”

“Taekwoon is easily turned on. That’s just the way he is, and they weren’t all intense. We put in a few quickies on his lunch break yesterday.” Hongbin grinned as he listened to Wonshik’s puking noises on the other end of the line.

“Too much information! During lunch! That’s just sick. Beside the point, how do you fathom that as regular routine? It was one thing when you two rough fucked 4 years ago, while you were actually involved with society. It’s an entirely different thing now. He’s doing it that many times, and I know Taekwoon isn’t kind. You must have so many marks.”

Marks along with other things. Hongbin will never admit to Wonshik how right he is, but he’s completely right. Hongbin's body is littered with wounds. They hurt like hell, but they were given by Taekwoon so it doesn’t matter. It’s the heat of the moment and he’s never meant too.

“What does it matter about marks? I’m fine. I’m still living and breathing perfectly well.”

“Lies. You’re not living perfectly well. He’s changed you Hongbin! He’s screwed with your mind or something. Brainwash!”

“Please, this isn’t a cartoon.”

“Exactly! If it was, I wouldn’t be nearly as concerned. Why do you think I’m still on this after so long? I want what’s best for you Hongbin. He’s abusing you, emotionally. Just for the sake of argument let’s ignore the physical piece of it. He doesn’t let you leave the house! You don’t know your own address Hongbin! He broke off all the communications you ever had with the world, he makes you cook for him, clean everything. He doesn't care for you when he hurts you. Where is he right now? Huh!”

Hongbin took deep breaths, trying his best to remain calm. Wonshik just didn’t know what he was talking about. Taekwoon loves him. Taekwoon loves him. He’s just not the best with people, and wants Hongbin all to himself. That’s a good thing. That’s how it’s supposed to be.

“He’s at work Wonshik.”

“How do you know that? Admit it to yourself! Taekwoon is probably out getting drunk off his ass with only the lord knows who! He’s doing that after locking you in that house, hurting you, and leaving you alone to fend for yourself knowing that you’re going to do nothing but suffer and wait for him to come back!”

Hongbin couldn’t take it anymore. He had no right. He had no right to say those words.

“SHUT YOUR GODDAMN MOUTH WONSHIK! DON’T YOU DARE SPEAK THAT WAY ABOUT HIM AGAIN! YOU DON’T KNOW ANYTHING!” Hongbin screamed, causing a momentary silence. Both ends could be heard breathing deeply and taking a moment to collect their emotions.

“What don’t I know? Tell me.” Wonshik still sounded as firm as ever, however that didn’t mean Hongbin wasn’t going to try. He was tired of this argument that had been going on for so long.

“You haven’t seen me in person in 4 years. Not since I moved in with him. You don’t know what has happened since. You certainly don’t know anything about Taekwoon! Have you forgotten? You used to be friends with him. Now you’ve left him and are calling him a drunk and a bastard.”

“I was friends with him until he became those things. You’re more important to me.”

“Stop pretending you’re doing this for me! Insulting Taekwoon isn’t helping me! It’s killing me, don’t you understand? I love him. He’s---he’s my everything and you’re trying to rip my everything to shreds. I don’t stay because I’m scared or because he’s brainwashed me into thinking I need to. I stay because I need him. Do you hear that? I need him. I need that drunken bastard to fuck me as much as he wants and I need him to hurt me and lock me away and do whatever he wants as long as he still loves me!”

Hongbin was met with an uncomfortable silence. He has never gotten through to Wonshik. They must have done this thousands of times and Hongbin has never gotten through to the man. There was something different about this though. As Hongbin lie there, tears threatening to fall from his eyes, something about this mood just felt different from the last argument. There was an unseen emotion arising from the man on the other end. He felt….heartbreak. Like Wonshik’s heart had been shattered in that moment. 

“Hongbin, I…I don’t know what tell you. I’m so sorry but, that’s not right.” A tear slipped down Hongbin’s cheek. It still hadn’t been enough. “Don’t say anything yet, just wait till I’m finished. That can’t be how you really feel…you couldn’t have thought that for so long and not told me. Hongbin, how could you think that? You don’t realize how sick those words sounded, do you? That’s not love! That’s being dependent. Completely and utterly dependent on someone that obviously does not care for you.”

At that sentence, Hongbin’s heart shattered too. He realized that he never should have called Wonshik. He should have known this was going to happen.

“No. He cares for me. He cares for me and I care for him. You just don’t understand.”

“Is it truly me? Am I the one not understanding, because it sounds to me like your saying those words to yourself?” Once again, more silence. Hongbin didn’t know how to reply. The only thing he knew being that he couldn’t take this anymore. He couldn’t listen to Wonshik continue on. Every word, no matter how positive or negative, felt like a jab to his gut. It felt like Wonshik had attempted to stab Taekwoon and missed, hitting him instead. He twisted the knife a little more with each continued syllable.

“You’re wrong. I know what I’m saying, and you’re just as wrong now as you were 4 years ago. I need to leave.” Wonshik sounded as if he was about to blurt something in return however with that, Hongbin ended the call.

Hongbin couldn’t decide what to do at this point in time. There was a small piece of his brain that was pissed. That part told him to rip the phone from the wall and toss it out the window, so far Wonshik just may be able to see it from wherever they are. The majority of his brain was just depressed.

Hongbin supposed he had been lying to himself earlier. Wonshik wasn’t a good friend, at least not any longer. He used to be. Now all Wonshik does is nag, the two argue, and the conversation always ends with someone getting their feelings hurt. This time it just so happened to be Hongbin.

When Hongbin felt this way, he craved for nothing more than Taekwoon’s touch. In a fantasy realm Taekwoon would grip Hongbin into his arms, holding him tight against his chest. Hongbin would sob into his loose fitting T-Shirt as Taekwoon rubbed circles into his fragile back, whispering sweet comforts against his neck.

In reality, Taekwoon may not care all too much. It depended on the day he had at work. If it was a good day, Taekwoon would at least try in his own special way. He would kiss Hongbin’s neck, gradually working his way down to lower areas. Taekwoon’s hands would not be able to keep themselves off the other’s toned body, as he groped each area his lips hadn’t already stained.

In entire honesty, Hongbin wouldn’t mind that at this moment. As much as he would like to be held, he knew it wouldn’t occur any time soon. Taekwoon just wasn’t that type of man, and Hongbin was alright with that. With Taekwoon by his side, Hongbin wouldn’t need to think about Wonshik any longer. Taekwoon could fuck the pain away.  
Unfortunately, both of those options were unrealistic at this moment. With Taekwoon at work, Hongbin wasn’t left with much he could do. Usually he would try and work out a little, or simply watch television until Taekwoon arrived. After bad conversations with Wonshik, he would do what he planned to do now: sleep.

Hongbin walked into the bedroom, still not bothering to change out of his boxers. He figured he would do so once he woke up. He wasted no time in entering underneath the covers, the simple fact of knowing Taekwoon and he had slept there together last night already becoming a slight comfort. Gripping Taekwoon’s pillow within his hands, Hongbin closed his eyelids. His thoughts wandered, as his mind drifted into unconsciousness.

~Four Years and Three Months Prior~

“Taekwoon. I didn’t know this was how you felt about me?” Hongbin’s felt as if his tone spoke miles in that moment, as his voice trembled with every syllable. He knew that Taekwoon and he had been dating for a while now, however he had never thought he would receive this much commitment from the other. Hongbin had been under the impression that Taekwoon struggled sharing his space with other people, therefore it shocked him that his love would ask such a thing.

“How else would I feel about you? We’ve been together for a long time. Why? Do you not want to?” Taekwoon’s previously joyous expression rapidly changed, his demeanor sulking downwards with the thought. Hongbin had never meant to hurt his feelings, and perhaps that had been the wrong moment to say something like that. He hadn’t intended for it to come across that way in the slightest.

“No! Of course I do! I was just surprised, that’s all. I didn’t think you were the type to like things like that.”

“Well, I wasn’t earlier. I never even considered trying it with anyone else but…but I really like you. Will you please move in with me?” Hearing the words for a second time, Hongbin still felt as if this moment was so surreal. As if he had been sucked into a fairytale without any sort of warning. With such a fantastic feeling rising within his chest, Hongbin couldn’t help the hitch that came before his words.

“I would love to Taekwoon.” Hongbin couldn’t help but feel as if he had appeared unsure. He prayed that he hadn’t because he truly did want this for them. His relationship with Taekwoon had been nothing but happy, including the few steamy moments that snuck their way inbetween. Hongbin saw no reason that Taekwoon and he could not and would not live happily for the rest of their lives.

Taekwoon had never been expressive, however at that moment Hongbin could practically smell the joy radiating off him. Taekwoon didn’t waste a second before pulling Hongbin into a deep hug, the two embracing each other fully and entirely. It just felt….right.

“I love you Hongbin. I love you too much for words to describe.”

“I love you too Taekwoon.” That day the both of them were truly and utterly happy. They had announced that they were getting a house together gladly and without a care in the world. Neither of them could bring themselves to give even a speck of distaste when nearly every one of Hongbin friends had practically screamed in disapproval. It wasn’t that they didn’t like Taekwoon. Hongbin just simply assumed his friends didn’t know what they were talking about.

Every single one of them had the same reasoning for their explanation. Taekwoon was just too nice. Taekwoon was the sweetest, most wonderful person Hongbin had ever met and the people he hung around just couldn’t fathom how anyone could be so accepting all the time. They all claimed that too much kindness kills a person and they feared that if Hongbin moved in with him he was going to get stuck in the downfall. Hongbin had told them simply and bluntly that they were crazy, and there was absolutely no way any one of them were going to change his mind.

Two months later Hongbin and Taekwoon were still searching for a place. They had collectively decided that they wanted their first place to be a home together, and until that day they thought it was best they stay in separate places for the time being. It had been at least a couple weeks since Hongbin had last seen his boyfriend in person. Hongbin had grown busy with school and Taekwoon had received extra work, those things combined with the house search had left their contact to strictly video chats for a short while.

“Taekwoon, how have you been? Has work been going well recently?” Hongbin made conversation with his other half happily, a bright smile on his face as he did so. Across the screen Taekwoon didn’t look like he was smiling, but Hongbin knew that he was happy. He could see it in his eyes.

“Yes, I sold another song this morning.”

“Really? That’s amazing babe! Message me the title and artist once it’s released so I can listen to it. I always take the best photos when I listen to your songs. The last release got me extra points on a really important test.”

“Of course it did, that photo was amazing.”

“That’s because it was a picture of you hyung.” The two giggled with the happy conversation, as there chat continued. It made Hongbin sad that he knew he could only talk for a short while, as he had to meet up with a girl from his class shortly. They had been assigned to do a project together. This talk reminded him of how long it had been since they had last seen each other. It made him miss Taekwoon even more.

“I’ve been looking really hard for a house, but so far I haven’t had any luck. All the places in this area are too expensive for us hyung.” Hongbin looked towards his boyfriend with a cute pouty face, hoping his failed attempt at aegyo would lighten up the sad news.

“That’s also okay. It’s not certain, but I think I may have found a place we can afford.”

“Really? Where is it?!” Hongbin practically exploded with excitement, his face moving off the screen for a moment as he bounced on his furniture.

“I’ll show you when I know for sure that we can have it. It’s looking pretty good right now though.” A warm feeling spread through Hongbin’s chest, as he stopped jumping on top his couch for a minute. He moved his finger over the lock button, taking a screen capture right as a wide smile spread across Taekwoon’s face. His smile always looked the most beautiful, and Hongbin reminded himself to have that photo developed when he got to school the next day.

“I’m so excited hyung. That means we’ll get to meet soon, right?”

“Earlier than soon.” Another happy shriek exited Hongbin’s mouth.

“Yay! I can’t wait! Keep me up to date so I can see you up close next time okay? I have to go now, I have a school project I need to work on. I’ll call you again tonight, okay?”  
“Alright sunshine. Take some pretty pictures for me. I love you!”

“I love you too.” Hongbin smiled, ending the call at that frame. He pressed the button quickly, that way Taekwoon would see him smiling as the last picture he saw. Hongbin was always sad when their conversations ended, and he didn’t want that to be Taekwoon’s last words with him for the moment.

Grabbing his camera and assignment papers, Hongbin quickly ran out the door. The call with Taekwoon had lasted longer than he thought, and he was running late. Thankfully her house wasn’t too far away, so he was able to reach it in a little less than 10-20 minutes. She had been more than prepared, having impatiently waited for him to get there.  
“What took you so long? We were supposed to start half an hour ago!”

“I’m sorry, I got a little distracted. I’ll work very hard to make up the time we lost!” Hongbin bowed towards her, hoping that the action would get her to forgive him. He knew this assignment was going to be a little difficult, and he understood why she was upset. The teacher had told them they needed to take artistic photos of a party like atmosphere, the catch being the pictures needed to be taking place in the exact situation they were given. Their group had been given: Your best friend and you alone at the house.

After some deep contemplation and discussion, the both of them agreed that cliché was the best way to go. Rather than choosing things that they would consider a good time, it was best to take photos with something most people would associate with a party. What would be a more cliché party item than liquor?


	2. Part 2

“Are you sure this is okay? Shouldn’t we just use cranberry juice?”

“Cranberry juice.” The look painted across her face was no joke. It almost scared Hongbin how serious she appeared, her expression screaming out the feelings that her partner was a complete moron.

“You know, something that just looks like alcohol. Drinking real beer will get us drunk too quickly to produce anything good.”

“What, you have a weak liquor tolerance? We won’t drink barely any, just enough to get a good shot.” Hongbin still didn’t agree with her, and bad feelings were beginning to grow in the pit of his stomach. At that moment he felt like he wanted to talk to Taekwoon. Tell him how much he loved him, and how his partner seemed quite reckless.

No matter how greatly Hongbin disagreed, in the end his partner got the better hand. Hongbin couldn’t tell her that he would surely get drunk from a bottle or two, as he had never drank more than a few sips before that night. His dad had been an alcoholic, and Hongbin had always been off put by the substance after watching what it did to his father. His dad was a nice man, but his desire for more had driven him mad. Hongbin didn’t want the same thing to happen to himself or anyone else for that matter.

Hongbin learned the hard way that he never should have given in that night. It turned out, Hongbin was a very light drunk. Two bottles in and Hongbin was seeing stars, the room spinning around in circles and his vision growing hazy. Every last thought of the project was gone, and all Hongbin could seem to do was ramble on about Taekwoon. How wonderful he is and how much he missed touching his skin.

Hongbin couldn’t process what the woman next to him was doing. She didn’t seem to be nearly as drunk as he was, however she too had completely forgotten of completing their work. Hongbin looked up at her, seeing her own dark brown locks one second, and the next her face started to look more and more like that of his boyfriend’s. The last thing he remembered she had asked him to walk towards the door with her. Hongbin had taken one step, immediately growing dizzy and toppling onto the hard wood flooring.

Hongbin had awoken emotionally hurt with regret rapidly filling his heart. He didn’t fully remember what had happened or what exactly had possessed him to do what he had done. He only knew that he had woke up in a bed that wasn’t his own, in a bedroom that definitely wasn’t one that he recognized. He awoke completely naked and laying next to the female he had been assigned to be partners with.

Hongbin scrambled from the bed, his hands gripping his chest as his heart raced thousands of miles a minute. He wouldn’t have. He never could have cheated on Taekwoon, much less with a woman. He was gay. He always had been so this had to be just one big misunderstanding. It had to be. He loves Taekwoon. He really does love Taekwoon and he never would have cheated on him. He really didn’t, and they never did anything together.

Hongbin pleaded that it was a lie. He begged and prayed to every soul in this universe that would listen, screaming to himself thoughts that were supposed to be meant as some sort of comfort. No matter what Hongbin did to convince himself, it felt as if he had been stabbed in the chest once she told him what had happened. He had done it. Hongbin really did do things with that person, and the girl entirely remembered every last detail of it. She said she had encouraged him to do it thinking that getting pictures of the two acting romantically would make a good photo for the project. She had known Hongbin was dating someone yet she didn’t care.

Hongbin grabbed all of his belongings, his body acting separately from his mind. He exited the girls place, barely making it onto the sidewalk before he collapsed into tears, sobs wrecking his body. Hongbin really hadn’t meant to. He didn’t know what overcame him in that moment but Hongbin really hadn’t meant for anything to happen. His limbs felt weak, intense sobs wreaking havoc onto his body.

Hongbin had barely been able to register the vibration. Moving his hands upwards from the ground, Hongbin tried to wipe the tears from his face. He sniffled as he pulled the phone from his pocket, seeing Taekwoon’s contact ID in front of him. Hongbin stopped breathing for a moment, fear and panic controlling his body.

Hongbin didn’t know what he was supposed to do. He knew that he would never be able to live with himself if he lied to Taekwoon. Hongbin had never lied to him before, and starting now would only destroy any sense of peace that could still be salvaged from there relationship. Hongbin also didn’t know if this was the right moment to tell Taekwoon though. The morning after, a complete and utter mess, while sitting on the very street of the girl that he had done it with. It didn’t seem like the right place, and at the very least Taekwoon deserved for the girl to be far far away from them both. 

That thought running through his mind, Hongbin didn’t answer. Instead he allowed the call to transfer to voicemail, gathering his camera that had fallen and standing himself back up. His legs weren’t steady and Hongbin’s entire figure shook, however he managed. Leaving every last trace of that project behind him, Hongbin sprint away. He sprint away from the area, running and running until every last bit of oxygen had left his lungs.

The way back to his apartment had seemed to take ages and Hongbin had been crying for good long piece of it. Even the most miniscule thought of Taekwoon would send Hongbin’s mind in a frantic state, and he wondered how he was ever going to tell him while he was this way. He questioned how he was ever going do as little as utter the words.

Upon reaching his apartment Hongbin had thought he needed to collect his mind. He felt it wasn’t right for him to be acting this heartbroken, especially if he was about to tell his boyfriend about what he had done. Taekwoon should be given the space he needed to react however he needed to, and Hongbin felt it was wrong to burden him by saying the words while in tears.

Hongbin rested his mind within his own bedroom, wishing to control himself just for a few short minutes. Just until he had uttered the words and Taekwoon had done as he desired, most likely breaking up with him. Hongbin didn’t want to do as much as think about the scenario, but he was well aware that it was highly probable. A life without Taekwoon was not a life Hongbin wanted to experience, but these types of things will of course split the two people apart.

Hongbin hadn’t been prepared yet, however deep down he knew that he would never be entirely okay. By the time Hongbin had received the fourth call from Taekwoon, he knew that it was time he get the task over with. Hongbin picked up the phone, his fingers trembling too much as he did so. He had needed to lean the phone against his countertop, setting the angle towards himself so that he could be seen. Hesitating slightly, Hongbin pressed the button and Taekwoon’s beautiful face flashed across the screen.

“Sunshine, you never called me last night. Was your project harder than you expected?” Hongbin’s gaze glared towards the mattress, his eyes refusing to look up from his lap. The air caught inside his throat and it felt as if he couldn’t breathe.

“Sunshine, are you okay?” Hongbin didn’t need to look at his face. He could hear the intense concern seeping through Taekwoon’s voice.

“What’s wrong? Did something happen to you? Are you hurt somewhere?” Hongbin knew that he was acting like a child. He had answered this call so that he could let Taekwoon know what happened and apologize, yet all he was doing was letting Taekwoon worry. Hongbin knew this wasn’t right and he just had to muster up the courage at some point in time. It would better for them both if he did it quickly. Barely able to do so, Hongbin gathered the courage to look up from his legs. Taekwoon looked beyond concerned….he looked scared. Hongbin couldn’t handle the sight, bursting into tears immediately.

“I’m so sorry. I’m so very sorry Taekwoon, i-it was an accident. I’m so sorry. I-I didn’t---I didn’t know what-.”

“Wait. Wait, hold on. Take a deep breath sweetheart, what happened? What are you sorry for?” Hongbin didn’t want to do this. He knew that it was necessary, but he didn’t want this to be happening right now. Hongbin knew at that moment that he couldn’t bear to loose Taekwoon.

“I-I screwed up Taekwoon. I’m so sorry, but I-I went to meet my partner last night and we---we-“

“You what?”

“We had sex Taekwoon.” Hongbin looked towards the other’s face, wishing with all his heart that lightning would come forth and strike him dead in that moment. Hongbin had never seen Taekwoon look so heartbroken before. “I’m so sorry. I was really drunk and-and she pushed for us to get in bed together. I’m so sorry.” Silence infected the air, Hongbin struggling to restrain the tears once again.

“How….how drunk were you?” Hongbin could no longer see Taekwoon’s face, however he could tell from his voice that he was crying. Taekwoon choked the words out as if it physically pained him to speak.

“All I can remember is that I couldn’t stand straight anymore…she asked me to stand up and I fell over almost immediately.” Hongbin could clearly listen to Taekwoon sniffling, his eyes barely registering the sight of his hands reaching to wipe his tears away.

“You didn’t do it because you---you didn’t like something about us….did you?”

“No, of course not hyung! Please, I—I love you I really do. I love you with all my heart, I just didn’t know what I was doing.” Taekwoon sniffled a few more times before his face fully came back into the frame of the camera. Hongbin’s soul felt as if it was shattered seeing his eyes so red and puffy.

“Okay. It was a mistake then. As long as you really mean it when you say you still love me, I can forget about it.” Hongbin sat there for a moment, his entire being stunned beyond belief. That quickly? Hongbin knew that Taekwoon was quick to accept things as they are, however never in a million years would Hongbin had thought Taekwoon would forgive him just like that.

“Oh my god hyung, yes! Yes I swear on my life that I mean it and I promise to never go near a drop of alcohol so long as my body is still on this earth.” 

“Alright then. Let’s just forget that it happened and move on. The amount of extra work I have is beginning to die down. How about I come to see you this weekend?”

“Yes, of course hyung! Yes.”

“Okay, I’ll see you in a couple days then.” Just like that, the call was finished. Hongbin still had trouble believing that this was actually reality. That Taekwoon had actually just forgotten about it that quickly, however Hongbin had no reason to think that he didn’t. Taekwoon had even planned to see him again, just a few days from now.

The days passed by gradually, and Hongbin began to realize that perhaps Taekwoon hadn’t been as accepting as he said he was. Just as he said he would, Taekwoon came to visit Hongbin during the weekend. Everything went very well, besides the fact that Taekwoon had been acting extremely touchy. Hongbin had needed to step around him lightly otherwise he would grow irritated very quickly. If Hongbin didn’t have a hand touching Taekwoon at all times, Taekwoon would grow very angry with him.

Hongbin had been more than able to accept this fact, knowing that what he had done would of course put Taekwoon on edge. He was well aware that it would take time to grow Taekwoon’s trust back, however with time it only seemed to get worse. Before he knew what had happened Taekwoon had forbid him from doing so much as looking at another human being. Taekwoon had started drinking and things only escalated, however Hongbin didn’t look back. Hongbin knew he had done wrong, and he deserved to endure whatever it was that Taekwoon needed to feel assured once again. Hongbin had still moved in with him a month later. Taekwoon had blindfolded him along the way, claiming he was scared that the neighbors would do things to him if they saw his face.

~Present Time~

Hongbin should have begun preparing for Taekwoon long before he had actually chosen to do so. He had told him that morning that he would work on his cooking skills, therefore Hongbin was aware that Taekwoon would have high expectations. Hongbin mentally slapped himself at this moment, knowing that he should have set an alarm before he allowed himself to sleep for so long. Instead Hongbin had awoken an hour later than he was supposed to, taken ages to change out from his now entirely nasty boxers, and was running extremely late in preparing for dinner. Taekwoon would be home any moment now and Hongbin was far from nearly ready.

Just as Hongbin scrambled across the kitchen, desperately searching out the correct kitchen utensil, he heard the door start to creak open. Hongbin froze in place, listening intently to every tiny peep that could be heard from Taekwoon’s direction.

“Fuck.” Hongbin whispered quietly underneath his breath. Taekwoon was piss drunk. Hongbin didn’t need to look at his face to recognize what condition the other had arrived in, but rather he could tell from the sound of Taekwoon’s footsteps. They were louder than usual, dragging behind him and stepping unevenly, like he was more stumbling foreword than walking.

“Hongbin!” Taekwoon’s voice only reassured Hongbin of what he had already become aware of as his lover slurred though speaking the name. Hongbin rushed towards the living area, attempting to appear as if everything was casual, although he knew what would happen with Taekwoon in his current state. Taekwoon stood in front of him, his cheeks colored bright red and his eyes struggling to focus on the other. “I get home, and what do I see in front of me? Nothing. What the hell have you been doing?!”

Hongbin attempted to distance himself as Taekwoon stumbled towards him. Hongbin could practically see the steam coming from his ears.

“I’m sorry, I slept a little long. I’m running behind tonight.” Hongbin bit his lip, attempting to repress the urge to wince in pain as Taekwoon gripped Hongbin’s hair, hauling the younger towards him without a hint of care. Hongbin could smell the alcohol in his lover’s breath as he spoke directly onto the others cheeks.

“Aish, just what I needed. You stay home all day and yet you can’t manage to do something as little as making dinner properly?” Hongbin couldn’t suppress the scream. He listened to the sound of his bones pop as Taekwoon tossed him foreword, his back and shoulder crashing violently against the wall.

“I’m sorry. It won’t happen again, I promise.”

“Damn right you promise.” Taekwoon neared closer, his foot connecting quite sharply with Hongbin’s rib cage. Hongbin could have sworn he heard something snap as Taekwoon grabbed his hair once more, using it to shove his head against the back wall. Hongbin began seeing stars, blood seeping from something inside his body starting to drip off his broken lips. “It just must be your mission to make my life difficult, isn’t it?”

Hongbin couldn’t reply, his lungs expelling blood onto the carpeting as Taekwoon dragged him to the front room. Taekwoon’s footing was too unsteady, knocking tables towards the ground and ramming Hongbin’s limbs into various objects as they so. Hongbin watched the phone tumble towards the floor when Taekwoon yet again started to fall foreword, hearing a click as the fall triggered some sort of response from the machine. He watched this, however Hongbin could not retain focus for long as his lover yanked him in front of his direct eye sight.

Hongbin watched as Taekwoon undid his pants, pushing them around his ankles and allowing his growing erection to be seen. Taekwoon struggled to keep Hongbin steady as the younger titled from side to side, his body lacking the energy and capabilities to hold itself upright. Hongbin was aware that something was very wrong this time around. His chest pained him too greatly, there was too much blood caught in his throat. Taekwoon had broken something he didn’t intend too.

“T-Taekwoo--“Hongbin couldn’t finish speaking the word. Blood expelled its way from his throat, making Hongbin scream in pain as his chest protested every kind of motion. His body only revolted against itself more, as Taekwoon forced his erection into Hongbin’s mouth.

Hongbin knew what he wanted, and usually he would have given it to the other gladly. This time he couldn’t do it. Hongbin couldn’t breathe, his throat choking on Taekwoon’s long length and his lungs halting from something else entirely. Hongbin couldn’t speak, only barely able to register Taekwoon’s words as tears dripped down his face from pain.

“What the fuck are you doing?!” Taekwoon relented for a moment. Taekwoon pulled himself from Hongbin’s mouth, Hongbin’s head dropping towards the floor as more blood came. “Hongbin! Hongbin keep your fucking head up and look at me!” Taekwoon yanked Hongbin’s head towards his face once again, truly looking at the other’s condition for the first time.

“Hongbin?........Hongbin!” It was like a switch flipped in his brain. For the first time since Taekwoon had started hitting him that night, Taekwoon actually looked at the other’s condition. Hongbin’s eyes were closed, his head dropping foreword as he struggled to breathe. His lips were beginning to turn a purplish-blue and tears of pain were streaming down his cheeks.

Taekwoon stopped, fixing his appearance before easing Hongbin down onto his lap. It seemed as if Taekwoon had suddenly become sober within those few seconds, as if he suddenly cared. “Hongbin! Hongbin, oh my god! Stay with me please! Please, I’m getting help!”

Taekwoon searched for the phone. He searched and searched, but the room had become a mess and nothing was in its correct place. Panic started to set in…started to debilitate him as the realization hit Taekwoon that he had done all of this.

Sirens appeared from nowhere and people began barging into the house. Paramedics and police officers, the later grabbing Taekwoon and pulling him away from Hongbin. The paramedics took one look at Hongbin’s condition and immediately screamed for a stretcher to be brought in. Taekwoon watched as they lifted Hongbin, screaming out medical terms that Taekwoon couldn’t register, setting an oxygen mask over his lips before they pushed him away.

Taekwoon began crying, the officers holding his wrists behind his back and cuffing them without hesitation. He didn’t know what was going on, and he didn’t understand how any of these people knew what had been happening. All Taekwoon knew was that he had done it, and he had hurt Hongbin far beyond what he had ever intended. The officers took Taekwoon away in tears, Taekwoon not protesting as they pushed him into the back of the police vehicle.

~Three Days Later~

Hongbin felt as if he had been hit by a truck. His head moved from side to side as his eyelids attempted to force themselves open, the later not very accepting of the light. He didn’t know where he was. He didn’t know what was happening, except knowing that his chest hurt like hell.

“Hongbin! Hongbin, are you okay? Are you hurting? Do I need to call the doctor?” Hongbin struggled to recognize who the voice was that spoke next to him. It took him a moment before he had been fully able to open his eyes. Fully able to register where he was, in a hospital bed. The man in front of him was Wonshik, although a slightly odd and aged Wonshik. Hongbin started to panic, trying to lift himself up but quickly stopping once his chest screamed in pain from the action.

“Don’t move. I’ll call the doctor in.”

“No. What the fuck is going on?! Why are you here? Where the hell is Taekwoon?!” Hongbin struggled to sit himself up, Wonshik reaching his hands out as if he had been attempting to help him. Hongbin pushed his him away, sensing that he had done something. Hongbin remembered what happened now. He remembered what Taekwoon did but he didn’t care. Hongbin felt like he was out of breath now, he was in pain but it didn’t matter. He wanted Taekwoon.

“Calm down Hongbin. Don’t scream, or you’re going to hurt yourself. I’m here because I brought you here. You called me from the house phone.” Hongbin hesitated. He hadn’t called him. Well, sure he had called him earlier in the morning but why the hell would Hongbin call him when Taekwoon was angry?

Hongbin began to flash back to that night, running through the events in his head. The phone….Hongbin had heard the phone click when it fell. The force must have pressed a button and it dialed the last call that was in its memory. Shit, what the fuck did Wonshik do to Taekwoon?

“What have you done? Where is hell Taekwoon!” Hongbin coughed and wheezed as he screamed, his body clearly not happy with the excessive force.

“Hongbin, stop! You’re hurting yourself! I did what any sane person would do and called the police! When you’re friend calls you and you can tell that someone is hurting him, that’s what you do! They tracked your home phone and sent officials to your house. Taekwoon is in the county jail.”

“What? No! No we---we need to-get him out.”

“Hongbin for lord sake, will you stop talking?! Let your body catch its breath! Do you understand how badly he hurt you? When the paramedics got there you were barely breathing. He broke 2 of your ribs, one piercing and therefore collapsing your lung. You also had an extremely severe concussion, you’re lucky to be alive!”

Hongbin halted all his movement for a moment, reluctantly doing as Wonshik said. Hongbin hated to it admit it but Wonshik was right about at least one thing. He needed to stop talking for a moment, or else Hongbin may pass out before he had a chance to save Taekwoon. Hongbin didn’t care how badly Taekwoon had hurt him. Hongbin was going to recover and he wanted Taekwoon to be there as he did, he couldn’t let Taekwoon rot in a jail cell.

“I---I need to get Taekwoon back.”

“For fuck sake, no you don’t! What you need is help and I plan on getting you some. I’m not letting you slip back into that monsters hands again. A friend of mine referred me to a really good psychiatrist, and I’m taking you there. Taekwoon’s going to stand in trail and he’s going to pay for what he’s done to you.”

“Wonshik….no. No please don’t do that. Please don’t make him go through that.”

“Hongbin, this is why you need help. Stop defending him! Look what he’s done to you! He practically raped you and beat you till you might as well have been dead. Stop defending him!”

“No, I---- I want him here. I want to see him. I don’t want him to go to prison. ---------- I don’t care what happens to me, but please don’t do that to him.”

“Hongbin, why? Why are you so dead set on protecting that fool?”

“Because it’s my fault!!” Hongbin rested for a few moments, letting oxygen return to his lungs before he continued speaking. “Taekwoon was nice, he—he was a great guy. Taekwoon has been suffering just as much as me, and this all happened because of what I did. ------------- Don’t force Taekwoon to go through any more pain….please.”

That was the first moment in years that Wonshik actually looked like he may have registered the words Hongbin spoke. This conversation was far from finished, however there was hope. Hongbin smiled for the first time in years, hope glinting through his eyes.

~6 Months Later~

Saying that Hongbin was enthusiastic at this moment, far too small to truly describe how great Hongbin was feeling. It had been forever, and through these long months the time seemed to double. It had taken a long time for Hongbin to recover from his injuries, especially after Hongbin had strained himself so much just days after it occurred. Hongbin had spent months in that hospital bed, Wonshik being irritating and overbearing to a degree when Hongbin almost wished that he had suffocated just so that the later would shut his mouth.

Wonshik had annoyed Hongbin to no end, not only obnoxiously obsessing over his physical health, however arguing with him over his mental health as well. Just as he had said, Wonshik had forced Hongbin to go see a specialist. There she diagnosed Hongbin as having dependent personality disorder, prescribing him nearly every drug Hongbin could possibly lay his eyes on. They all tasted awful, and still Hongbin would never take them if he didn’t know that Wonshik had paid hundreds of dollars for the damn things.

After Hongbin was well enough, Wonshik insisting that he live at his place. Hongbin didn’t want too but he gave in, quickly wishing he had just stayed in the hospital. Wonshik had become overprotective of the other to a beyond disturbing degree. Hongbin would never be fully recovered, meaning that any excessive exercise or strenuous screaming would leave Hongbin breathless quite fast, causing Wonshik to become a scary threatening mama bear. Hongbin so much as walked to quickly to the kitchen, Wonshik would be on him faster than someone could snap.

All that going through his head and for a while Hongbin still refused to do anything. His progress was slow, and it had taken months of therapy and medications to get Hongbin to the point he was at now. To the point where, Hongbin still pleaded that he would see Taekwoon again. Hongbin still prayed to the heavens at night that Taekwoon would somehow appear on his doorstep, however he could care for himself. Hongbin didn’t think he would cook for him again, or let Taekwoon hit him anymore after what happened.

Hongbin knew Taekwoon had gone through the same. Wonshik refused to bail Taekwoon out of jail, however Hongbin had convinced him to provide Taekwoon a good lawyer. Taekwoon had gotten off easy, not having to serve jail time on the insanity plea. Instead Taekwoon had spent the past six months behind the walls of a mental hospital, recovery from alcoholism as well as a few unnamed mental disorders. Today was the day he would be released.

Hongbin was ecstatic, wanting desperately to go see the other once again. Wonshik…not so much.

“Hongbin, I don’t think you’re ready for this. Maybe we should wait a couple more months.”

“Wonshik, no. Wasn’t telling you that you could creepily stalk us enough? Taekwoon and I aren’t going to do anything, we’re just going to talk. He’s not allowed to anyway. Taekwoon would go to jail if he tried to even touch me for too long.”

“How do we know that he’s actually improved at all? What if you see him and you instantly go back to the Taekwoon worshipping mess you were before? I don’t know if this is a good idea.”

“Wonshik, I will be fine. And I did not worship him!”

“You pretty much did.” Hongbin sighed, sending death glares towards the other before the cab pulled in front of the meeting spot. Hongbin grinned, looking through his pockets one last time before he got out the cab.

He brought something with him, just in case what Wonshik was saying had a little bit of basis. To remind himself that there was a better Taekwoon that he could go back too. A picture of Taekwoon’s smile. It was a sight Hongbin hadn’t seen in a very long time. Hongbin had developed the photograph that he had found on his old cell phone, the last one of Taekwoon before Hongbin had screwed everything up.

Hongbin looked at the picture one last time before exiting the cab. Wonshik followed barely four centimeter behind him. Hongbin stood, looking around until he saw him. Taekwoon. Hongbin knew that he was different. Then and there Hongbin knew…he was smiling.

“Now Hongbin don’t run-….too fast” Wonshik’s nagging was caught off guard as Hongbin sprinted towards Taekwoon. The older did the same, decreasing the distance so Hongbin’s lungs didn’t get too angry with him.

Hongbin felt his heart leap within his chest, warm and peaceful feelings filling his heart as Taekwoon hugged him. He didn’t feel anything, didn’t run his hands across any old marks. He just hugged him, held Hongbin in his arms.

“I missed you so much my sunshine.”


End file.
